Chapter 17: When They Leave Home - Trust, Pray, Accompany
This section is primarily for you, the parents. The formal, structured catechesis of the “domestic seminary” is complete. Your role now shifts from that of primary educator to that of prayerful companion, trusted advisor, and faithful witness. This transition requires a profound act of trust in God and in the work you have done.
You have spent 18 years tilling the soil, planting the seeds, and watering the garden. Now, you must trust the Divine Gardener to bring about the growth. Your active, daily formation becomes a ministry of intercession, encouragement, and presence.
Key Principles for this New Stage:
- Intercession is Your Primary Work: Your most powerful tool now is prayer. Pray for your adult children daily by name. Pray the Rosary for them. Offer Masses for their intentions. Your prayer covers them when your physical presence cannot.
- From Control to Accompaniment: You can no longer control their choices. Your role is to walk alongside them, offering wisdom when asked, but respecting their freedom. Unsolicited advice is often perceived as judgment.
- Be a Safe Harbor, Not a Courthouse: Your home should be the place they can always return, especially when they fail. They need to know that your love is unconditional, even if you do not approve of their choices.
- Live a Joyful, Attractive Faith: The most powerful catechesis you can now offer is the witness of your own ongoing conversion and joyful fidelity. Let them see a faith that is not a relic of their childhood, but a living, dynamic reality in your adult life.
- Trust the Seeds You Planted: Remember the Parable of the Sower. Some seeds will fall on rocky ground, and some among thorns. But the seeds of truth, beauty, and goodness you planted are resilient. The Holy Spirit can bring them to fruition years, or even decades, later. Never lose hope.